"My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from Him." (Psalm 62:5)
December has somehow made its way back around again! When I notice the year is nearly over, I always ask myself, where did the time go??? It seems that just yesterday, I was on the beach, basking in the sun and now it's cold and snowflakes will be falling sooner than I want to believe! The holidays are here again and everything and everyone is moving at record speeds!
This time of year has been bitter-sweet for me for several years now. Christmas has always been my favorite holiday and I look forward to the songs, holiday movies, shopping and just the whole joyful spirit that takes control of everyone. Since I entered my 30s, the bitter has merged with the sweet though! My 30s have added a sense of angst in me; a sense of sadness; and a bit of discouragement when it comes to the holidays and the end of an old year and the approach of a new one.
The coming of a new year is supposed to be filled with hope and excitement but for me it has been a time of assessing all that hasn't happened yet; all the prayers that still can't be checked off the list as DONE. It's December 2, 2014 today, so that means if God wants to end my year with a miraculous BANG, He has 29 days to make it happen! My heart believes that He can but the other parts of me are pulling in the opposite direction, toward feelings of discouragement and disappointment. So what do I do? I could cry, sulk, and let Satan have his way with me or I can stay on my knees, praying day and night; fasting through the close of this year and seeking more of God's strength with the hope that God will show his faithfulness in greater ways during the last days of this year. I'll keep trusting that He is the Great I Am and not the Great I Will Be! He is faithful to His word! There's still time and nothing's too hard for my God :-)
Song to listen to: "Hold On, Help Is On the Way" -Whitney Houston/The Preacher's Wife
Tuesday, December 2, 2014
Wednesday, November 5, 2014
What Is Your Purpose?
"I cry out to God Most High, to God who will fulfill His purpose for me." -Psalm 57:2 (NLT)
From time to time, I've heard sermons or read devotionals that ask people if they know what their God given purpose is, my answer has always been NO! As I look around at the people God has placed in my life, I can kind of answer this question for them...I mean most of my circle has children, and to me, that represents at least one significant purpose. On the other hand I'm two steps from 40 years old and I haven't been blessed in that area yet.
Even my friends who have children complain that they still don't see the purpose God has for them; they say "there's got to be more to life than being a mother." I am blessed to know at least two people who seem to have found their purpose in their careers, which they decided upon very early in life and now love dearly even on those days when everyone at their job gets on their nerves! I envy them though because I've struggled for quite some time with this whole concept of "PURPOSE." Purpose, in my career; purpose in my singleness; purpose in my existence...
Unfortunately, I have not ever worked in a job that I just knew was my calling. My work has been necessary, maybe even important but never exciting, interesting or fulfilling to me. I've often asked God to show me my purpose; to open my spiritual eyes and help me to see but as I sit here typing today...I still wait for the answer.
So, what do we do while we wait on God to show us our purpose? What I've decided to do is to keep crying out, keep asking him, in prayer, to lead me and show me. I feel like a broken record on some days when I am constantly having an internal talk with God all day asking the same things over and over but I've truly come to a place in my life where I don't know where else to turn or who else to go to. There's something that's missing, some piece of my puzzle that's missing and I feel the void of that empty space everyday. I believe that we all long for that space that nags at us to be filled...to be filled with true purpose and joy. I know that the first step is the true knowledge of God and the building of a relationship with Him but I'm learning day by day that there are many more steps that come after that.
To be real, I'm feeling pretty exhausted today and I feel like I can't take another step but giving up is not an option for me so instead, I'll keep crying out because Isaiah 14:24 says," As I have planned, so it will be, and as I have purposed, so it will happen." God has a plan and purpose for each of us and for some of us, I know it seems like a not-so-fun game of hide and seek but just keep trusting and believing and the big reveal will surely come!
Song to listen to: "Hold On" -James Fortune & Fiya
From time to time, I've heard sermons or read devotionals that ask people if they know what their God given purpose is, my answer has always been NO! As I look around at the people God has placed in my life, I can kind of answer this question for them...I mean most of my circle has children, and to me, that represents at least one significant purpose. On the other hand I'm two steps from 40 years old and I haven't been blessed in that area yet.
Even my friends who have children complain that they still don't see the purpose God has for them; they say "there's got to be more to life than being a mother." I am blessed to know at least two people who seem to have found their purpose in their careers, which they decided upon very early in life and now love dearly even on those days when everyone at their job gets on their nerves! I envy them though because I've struggled for quite some time with this whole concept of "PURPOSE." Purpose, in my career; purpose in my singleness; purpose in my existence...
Unfortunately, I have not ever worked in a job that I just knew was my calling. My work has been necessary, maybe even important but never exciting, interesting or fulfilling to me. I've often asked God to show me my purpose; to open my spiritual eyes and help me to see but as I sit here typing today...I still wait for the answer.
So, what do we do while we wait on God to show us our purpose? What I've decided to do is to keep crying out, keep asking him, in prayer, to lead me and show me. I feel like a broken record on some days when I am constantly having an internal talk with God all day asking the same things over and over but I've truly come to a place in my life where I don't know where else to turn or who else to go to. There's something that's missing, some piece of my puzzle that's missing and I feel the void of that empty space everyday. I believe that we all long for that space that nags at us to be filled...to be filled with true purpose and joy. I know that the first step is the true knowledge of God and the building of a relationship with Him but I'm learning day by day that there are many more steps that come after that.
To be real, I'm feeling pretty exhausted today and I feel like I can't take another step but giving up is not an option for me so instead, I'll keep crying out because Isaiah 14:24 says," As I have planned, so it will be, and as I have purposed, so it will happen." God has a plan and purpose for each of us and for some of us, I know it seems like a not-so-fun game of hide and seek but just keep trusting and believing and the big reveal will surely come!
Song to listen to: "Hold On" -James Fortune & Fiya
Monday, October 27, 2014
Keep Asking, Seeking and Knocking!
"Pray without ceasing...for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." - 1 Thessolonians 5:17
During the last two years of my life, an exhaustion has settled in. Since coming to know God almost a decade ago, there have been things in my life that haven't gone as planned; that haven't turned out the way I thought they would; that have brought much disappointment and times hopelessness to my spirit. I am a Christian, and I do have a close relationship with God but I am also a human being with human feelings and human emotions.
I've read many devotionals that have said my feelings and emotions take control because my eyes are not fixed on Jesus and I know this to be true but again my human tendencies cause me to be drawn to what I can physically see instead of what I cannot. I haven't always looked through my eyes of faith and at times I am ashamed of that but in all of this I've created a huge sense of exhaustion, to the point where I feel like I can't even pray some days. The exhaustion has come mostly from God not meeting my timeline. Time and patience have been my worst enemies and throughout this time I've learned that God's time and our time is usually never aligned! I recently heard Joyce Meyer say "God is always on time but he's rarely early." Waiting on God to answer has been a struggle. My long list of prayers have far-surpassed their due dates and although I don't understand why, I believe God does. He can see what I can't and I am certain even as I struggle with wanting all the desires of my heart today, God is protecting me and making sure that every piece of my life's puzzle is just right to perfectly fit together. Until I see the manifestation of my prayers, God asks for one thing, that I "pray without ceasing."
It is very difficult some days to find the strength to pray the same ole prayers. It's very difficult to wake up hopeful that today is the day and go to sleep tonight without seeing the answers but in all of the trials and tribulations of this life, I've got to make a deliberate choice to keep on asking, keep on seeking, and keep on knocking until I see answers. I know God will answer one day, so I will continue to do my part even when it feels useless, even when I feel alone, even when it seems things will never turn around. I'm choosing to trust God even when I can't hear or feel Him and I am holding Him to his word for He has said that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him. I'm putting my energy today into trusting Him more and believing that He will do "exceedingly, abundantly, above all I can ask or think!"
Song to listen to: "Turning around for me" -Vashawn Mitchell
During the last two years of my life, an exhaustion has settled in. Since coming to know God almost a decade ago, there have been things in my life that haven't gone as planned; that haven't turned out the way I thought they would; that have brought much disappointment and times hopelessness to my spirit. I am a Christian, and I do have a close relationship with God but I am also a human being with human feelings and human emotions.
I've read many devotionals that have said my feelings and emotions take control because my eyes are not fixed on Jesus and I know this to be true but again my human tendencies cause me to be drawn to what I can physically see instead of what I cannot. I haven't always looked through my eyes of faith and at times I am ashamed of that but in all of this I've created a huge sense of exhaustion, to the point where I feel like I can't even pray some days. The exhaustion has come mostly from God not meeting my timeline. Time and patience have been my worst enemies and throughout this time I've learned that God's time and our time is usually never aligned! I recently heard Joyce Meyer say "God is always on time but he's rarely early." Waiting on God to answer has been a struggle. My long list of prayers have far-surpassed their due dates and although I don't understand why, I believe God does. He can see what I can't and I am certain even as I struggle with wanting all the desires of my heart today, God is protecting me and making sure that every piece of my life's puzzle is just right to perfectly fit together. Until I see the manifestation of my prayers, God asks for one thing, that I "pray without ceasing."
It is very difficult some days to find the strength to pray the same ole prayers. It's very difficult to wake up hopeful that today is the day and go to sleep tonight without seeing the answers but in all of the trials and tribulations of this life, I've got to make a deliberate choice to keep on asking, keep on seeking, and keep on knocking until I see answers. I know God will answer one day, so I will continue to do my part even when it feels useless, even when I feel alone, even when it seems things will never turn around. I'm choosing to trust God even when I can't hear or feel Him and I am holding Him to his word for He has said that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him. I'm putting my energy today into trusting Him more and believing that He will do "exceedingly, abundantly, above all I can ask or think!"
Song to listen to: "Turning around for me" -Vashawn Mitchell
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